Do it for yourself, not because you 'should'

So you think you want to do something, be something, have something, change something…

Now ask yourself these series of questions (probably easiest if you write down your answers or talk them through with someone else):

  1. What will being / doing / having / changing that thing do for me?
  2. And what will being / doing / having / changing that thing do for me?
  3. And what will being / doing / having / changing that thing do for me?
  4. And what will being / doing / having / changing that thing do for me?
  5. And what will being / doing / having / changing that thing do for me?

Yes, I know they're all the same question, but you are digging deeper at each level…

This will help you get to the real root of what you want and why….

And this will mean you totally understand why you want to do / be / have / change what you think you want to do/be/have/change and that understanding will provide your motivation throughout your actions.

BUT

If you get stuck on any of these questions…

Often the first one….

And any of your answers is "I don't know…."

Or "because I should…"

Then let this be your warning sign, your alarm bell

"SHOULD" is NEVER the right reason to want to be / do / have / change something

Because it means you're doing it for someone other than yourself.

Ask yourself these questions:

  • "Should" according to who?
    • Society? Partner? Parent? Friend? Other…
  • Why does their opinion matter more than yours?
    • Note: it doesn't
  • What would actually happen if you didn't be / do / have / change it?
    • Really happen, not the catastrophised version your worrying brain came up with… (I know, I’ve been there too!)

Now take a more empowered view:

  • Do I (I, ME!) want to do it?

If not, then take back your power and (politely) decline to be / do / have / change that something - either to the voice of judgement in your head, or to the person giving you "feedback"!

And if you still think you want to be / do / have / change it then stop making excuses and get on with it!

P.S. I know I said "should" - according to who - well this "should never" is according to me 😍  but I'd love you to adopt this philosophy too!