I can't do that, its so selfish!
I can't do that, so-and-so won't be happy, I'm just being selfish
I can't stop doing that, it will mean so-and-so have to [change their behaviour], so that's really selfish
I can't do that, people will think I'm really selfish
Does the idea of trying something new fill you with fear?
Do you prefer to stick with what you know - even if you don't really like it?
You may be stuck in your comfort zone….
We had a tortoise when I was younger (a long story for another time) but the first time we saw him on his back in the garden, we panicked that he was stuck!
Many of us feel like my old tortoise George on the odd occasion, but sometimes we can get really stuck in feeling stuck!
Some of the things you might notice about yourself if you're feeling stuck
Do you find it hard to make decisions, and end up going round and round in circles, sometimes paralysed into doing nothing??
Are you awake in the small hours thinking "but what if…., what if…., what if….."
Do you often feel anxious?
Do you often feel stressed?
Does your stress / anxiety sometimes feel disproportionate to a rational list of what you have going on?
And do you then go a little further into the negative cycle of judging yourself because you think you should be able to cope? Or do you think everyone else copes better than you?
Well let me tell you a little secret...
Are you a perfectionist?
Do you know (or live / work with) a perfectionist?
How many of these sound familiar?
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